Oh, the English Language

The sentances aren't all that great, but they do present a good example of what we are dealing with in English.


1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present , he thought it was time to present the present.

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) The dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row

12) They were too close to the door to close it.

13) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

14) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

15) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

16) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

17) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

18) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

"It's Normal Out"

The sun comes up in the usual fashion and sets in the usual fashion.
The rain falls in the usual fashion: saturation and evaporation in the usual fashion.
The moon is visible at night and during the day in its usual fashion.
Rotations and Revolutions of the Earth occur, again in the usual fashion.
“It is normal out.”
And so they walk among us
as the wounded.
In a place where no eyes can bear witness
there is great sorrow.
They are wounded on the inside.
And they walk
in the grocery store, the post office, the bank,
in school, at work, and at home.
They stand behind or in front in line.
They say, “Hello” or “Good Morning”.
Energy they give and take in the universe.
Bodies and Souls, they have.
And hearts, they have.
Oh, so much heart they have.
That they love and lose, to love again,
and again,
and again.
That they give to be taken, and give again,
and again,
and again.
They continue to be connected and whole,
even when they are fractured.
No megaphone do they hold, no shouts do they utter to us,
only do they walk.
One foot in front of heavy foot, they put.
One hand after numb hand to others, they extend.
One ear after endless ear, they offer.
And so they walk among us,
smiling with smiles as if they have always been returned,
and hugging with hugs as if they have always been welcomed,

even if they haven’t been.
And so they walk among us,
speaking with strength as if it has never been misinterpreted
and loving with love as if it has never been unrequited,

even if it has.

It's Common

Highlights from an Article brought to you by The American Pregnany Association

http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancycomplications/miscarriage.html

Spontaneous abortion (SAB), or miscarriage, is the term used for a pregnancy that ends on it's own, within the first 20 weeks of gestation.

Miscarriage is the most common type of pregnancy loss, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). Studies reveal that anywhere from 10-25% of all clinically recognized pregnancies will end in miscarriage. Chemical pregnancies may account for 50-75% of all miscarriages. This occurs when a pregnancy is lost shortly after implantation, resulting in bleeding that occurs around the time of her expected period. The woman may not realize that she conceived when she experiences a chemical pregnancy.

What are the chances of having a Miscarriage?

For women in childbearing years, the chances of having a miscarriage can range from 10-25%, and in most healthy women the average is about a 15-20% chance.

Emotional Treatment:

Unfortunately, miscarriage can affect anyone. Women are often left with unanswered questions regarding their physical recovery, their emotional recovery and trying to conceive again. It is very important that women try to keep the lines of communication open with family, friends and health care providers during this time.

Some helpful web sites that address miscarriage and pregnancy loss include:

• www.nationalshareoffice.com
• www.mend.org
• www.aplacetoremember.com
• www.madisonfoundation.org

Things that are funny and things One would think would be funny, but aren't

1. Farts (still)
2. Tickling (Traumatising!)
3. "Yer Mom" Jokes (just like we were ten)
4. The Funny Bone (not funny)
5. Charlie Chaplin
6. Clown Fish (or at least I think they're supposed to be)
7. Dilbert Cartoons (and I'm still upset that I understand offices enough for this to be true)
8. Puns (I love them)
   
9. Clowns (soooooo creepy)
10. A good round of the giggles =)
    

Things that are stupid

1. Condi
2. Large walls built between countries
3. Traffic Jams
4. Paper Cuts
5. Nazis
6. Broken Zippers
7. Standardized Tests
8. Not being able to merge in traffic
9. Racism and some other -isms (except for organisms)
10. Ingrown Toenails
11. Toupees and Come-overs
12. Homophobes
13. Explosive Diarrhea/ Chronic Constipation
14. Hang Nails
15. Dial-up

I tag Dell some more, and he can tag Lisa some more

Things that are weird

1. Twinkies
2. Having your friend's father look at your stuff (even if he is a doctor)
3. Parental Sexuality
4. Making out with your friends
5. Feet
6. Back Hair
7. Nut Sacs (totally weird)
8. Goose Bumps
9. The Funny Bone
10. NorCo Detox
11. When a huge chunk of wax falls out of your ear (even if you've cleaned it)
12. Sensitive artists
    
13. Goldfish
14. Snoring
    
15. Your Mom

I tag Dell =) and he can tag Lisa

Twice Tagged!!!

These are the rules once you've been tagged:

• Write a blog with the rules and ten weird things/habits about yourself.
• Choose ten people to be tagged and list their names on your blog.
• Go to their profiles and leave comments that say, "You've been tagged." and direct them to check your blog.

So I was tagged twice, (Lisa and Alex) and I wondered if it was possible to come up with 20 different strange-unknown-something-or-other habits or facts about myself, (don't worry, you only have to do 10):

1. I will drink flat soda... and like it.
2. I will drink flat soda that has been sitting in my car for a day or two... and still like it.
3. I eat food in the shower.
4. I drink coffee in the shower.
5. Sometimes when I'm thinking about something really intently, I will come to realize both my hands are touching my own butt.
6. I judge tapioca pudding on its texture... eww – eyeballs.
7. I can communicate in 4 languages, not including Pig Latin and Southern.
8. I have possessed the ability to play the flute for 16 years.
9. I am invisible in my car... This means I can: sing at the top of my lungs, have a 12-way conversation with myself, have a phone conversation, wave my hands around a lot while have either the phone or the with myself conversation, drink the couple day old flat soda, sob while continuing to drive, or pick my nose... and none of you can see me.
10. I can swim but can't float.
11. I went bungee jumping when I was 20-ish. I told my dad I would call him after I was done so he would know I was okay. I forgot............. for 2 days.
12. I secretly wish I am British.
13. Sometimes I pretend I am British.
14. I like my hot tea to be warm tea.
15. If I dropped the food on the floor and you didn't see me, I will eat it. No five-second rule needed.
16. I like to randomly break out in German.
17. If the present is wrapped, I will save all tissue, wrapping paper, cards, ribbons, bags, etc. (The unwrapping part is extremely painful to watch.)
18. I can't drink coffee after noontime without being wired all night, well wierder than usual.
19. I'm obsessed with knitting.
20. Ever do something ridiculous like stick the straw in your nose instead of in your mouth, look forward just in time to run into the pole, as you move in with your elbow - miss the arm on the chair, trip over your own feet when the ground is flat, misjudge how tall you are and hit a light, decoration, cabinet, or top of the door with your head, talk with something in your hands and as you do it flies out to hit someone else in the room, run into the side of the door frame, or any other options of ridiculous things we can do? Then, you look up and you lock eyes with the someone that has just seen you do that thing, and you know, that they know. I'm often the person that sees you. Sorry.

Tag:
Ashliegh
Lisa (again)
Pat
Josh
Adri
Stephanie
Mandi
Rachel
Dev
Quinn
Dell

New Beginnings

Happy New Year!

That's right, folks, we did it again. Here we are at the promise of a new way, with the hope of a new me, and packed with a whole set of new choices.
The new year is a funny thing. As a time of reflection on where I have been, where I am now, and where I wish to be in the future, the new year adds a dimension positive visualisation turned to pressure. The "newness" carries with it the idea that where I am exactly at midnight on December 31/January 1 will have some weight on where I am and what I am doing for the rest of the year. I was acutely filled with the need to be in the "right" place with the "right" people this year. I needed to end the year and begin the year with how I would like to see the rest of the year. My attempt was pretty successful and felt good, but I don't get to sit idly by as the rest of the year goes, just hoping that the next twelve months will fall into place because I spent 2 days fufilling positive intentions for them.
Well, I guess I could...
Hopefully I will treat each month with the significance of the New Year, or maybe each day, or maybe even each moment.